Sorry, I'm gonna vent

[AintQik]

1. I love my country

I have been dragging a 1950 Chevy p/u around the blessed country for 7 years. I am building it for my dad who is getting on in years and I have had hell trying to get it together due to lack of funds (military) and lack of any time at home (military). So I don't hate life and go insane, I've been working on my 67 Camaro PT car which is going well but slow due to money (military) and time home (military). We were going to get orders back to New Jersey where I was about to put an offer in on a house with a big shop so I could finally settle down, unpack all my neat car bending and building junk and see how it went. I could keep the "dream house" and if we move again mothball it to coem back to. But, I'm probably going to retire there. I might have the 50 done in time so I could take it out to my dad, hand him the keys and hope his old arse legs can still work the clutch. That whirlwind effort to get it done this winter has drained me of what little time I have and what little money I have but I didn't want to drag it across country again to some other base and have to unpack and start over. Now I have a son due in a month. He is going to be my lil shop helper and I was going to see him born and grow up, something I missed with my daughter. Gone all the time, ex-wife took off. Today, instead of orders to New Jersey, I get some to Bagram. I'm just drained.
I won't see the kid's first year. I won't get my house with my shop I always looked forward to, at least no time soon. If I don't fill that job opening back home, someone else will and I won't get it. I'll get to move to some other place when I get back from the desert and have to drag crap around a few more times. My dad's truck won't get done, and I'm getting a lil choked up but the old ******* better live until I get back and finish the damn thing. The 67 is the least of my worries. Just not destined to see any of my kids grow up, at least in the lil years. Sometimes this **** is hard.

2. I love my country